- Please help with your spare change please.

Anything's greatly appreciated.

Any spare change please.

Anything's greatly appreciated.

God bless you ma'am.

Any spare change please.

Anything is greatly appreciated.

I've been homeless almost two years now.

I would've never thought that I would be homeless.

Unfortunately I am.

Any spare change please.

Oh it's okay, everyone don't have it.

God bless you, have a wonderful day.

You know, when I walk with my sign and sometimes people look at me like I'm just nothin', no one.

And I feel that way a lot.

♪ I just wanna say thank you, Lord ♪ ♪ Thank you, Lord, I won't complain ♪ I do believe in God and I have faith that he's gonna bring me out of this.

I just don't know when.

Got one daughter, four grandkids and I don't, I feel like really bad because they have to see me like this.

I don't wanna impose on my family.

(traffic passing) Right now my living quarters is in a tent.

Where I am, it's tucked down under so it's really kinda spooky.

I sleep when I can, when I think I'm safe, then I'll go to sleep.

So my sleepin' hours, they're near raggedy.

Some nights when I'm, when I hear gunshots I get scared, thinking 'cause my bein' in a tent, it's cloth and bullets can come straight through it.

There's all kinda people out here.

People will be jogging, running through.

Sometime they walk past and they just stand there on the gate and you know, I'm thinkin' to myself, what are they thinking?

I put a lotta shopping carts up to the gate so if somebody does come in I'll hear them.

- Everybody okay?

- Yeah.

- The police come by and they check on us.

Have a good night.

Security for Costco, they check on us and we try to keep it clean as much as possible, pick up the paper and the leaves and we sweep the glass and we try to keep it clean.

♪ God help the lonely ♪ ♪ He ask that we free ♪ Clarence, you need to get that other side of that paper up from over there.

Clarence, me and Clarence met in the projects.

I used to sell loose cigarettes and he'd come buy a cigarette.

And that's how we met.

I told him I'm too old to be somebody girlfriend.

I need to be somebody wife.

(chuckling) You know you saw me.

He does nothing but try to motivate me and protect me.

There's nothin' I can ask him to do that he won't do for me.

I love him, I truly love him.

- I'm the boss.

- You're the boss, baby.

I'm gonna let you have that one today.

- I'll go actin' ugly though.

- He can't shake me, I can't shake him.

Better not even try.

See you when I get back or when you get back, whatever.

Love you.

(gentle music) That was my old apartment right there on the third floor, one of them.

I'm about a block away from where I was livin'.

I've been in the Lathrop area over 30 plus years.

It's my home.

(gentle music) Good mornin', my beautiful daughter.

You still in bed, huh?

Okay when do you think you and the kids might could come by?

Maybe the first couple days in the week when we do laundry, go to the laundromat and bring the kids.

How 'bout that?

Okay sweetheart, all right, I love you.

- [Daughter] Love you, too.

- All right, bye.

This is the last buildin' I was in right there in the top apartment with my, well, the guy I was stayin' with, that was our apartment up top.

Before I became homeless I was a live-in aid for this guy, his name was Stan.

May he rest in peace.

I loved that apartment.

My door stayed open to everybody.

When I cooked I would cook a big, big Army meal because I fed everybody like one big happy family.

Now everybody's like, "Man, TT Black, "we hate you gone, we miss you TT Black.

Good mornin' Niece, how are you?

They call me TT Black.

- Go on break it down.

You know you still got it.

- I still got it.

I'm the projects' Aunt T. - That's not good.

I'm prayin' for you.

- Thank you.

- It's hard on you.

- Yes it is, it's very hard.

All right, God bless you, thank you love.

All right.

One of the young boys told me, he was like, "you know, "you put a little of you in all of us TT Black."

I was like, "really?"

He was like, "yeah we got some of you in us, "'cause you always told us that when we see "you comin' we have to put our cigarette "behind our back or we have to stop cussin' "or fix our hats."

You know, so I mean that makes me feel good.

I was always there for everybody.

And now every time I see that buildin' I wanna cry.

I took care of Stanley 'bout 10 years and he passed away.

And when he passed away, housin's rule is if they pass away or they go to a nursin' home you have two weeks to vacate the premises.

I had nowhere to go so I didn't tell them that he passed.

It was just a matter of time them findin' out.

They evicted me.

I looked out the window and I see the sheriff's car and I knew they was comin' to put me out.

So I went right to the front door, unlocked it and went back in the room, put my clothes on.

Knock, knock, knock.

- Sheriff's Department, come to the door.

- I said, "it's open."

- Where you at?

- Almost done, almost done.

- Where you at?

- Right here, almost done.

- Oh my goodness.

Almost done.

- Yes.

- Doin' what?

Come here and let me see you.

(talking at the same time) (garbled audio) - They come in, they see me.

I say I already know I have to leave.

- I'm here for eviction, okay ma'am.

- Yeah I know.

- We don't pack, we don't move nothin'.

- I know.

- All right.

- Grab what I can grab and y'all lock it up.

- That's what happens.

You oughta talk to the landlord, the manager outside when you come back and retrieve your items, okay?

- Okay.

- Right now it's like you're goin' out for the day.

- Okay.

- Like, medication if you have any.

- I do.

- Money, cell phone charger, your ID, stuff like that, okay.

- Okay.

- Okay where's your stuff at, ma'am?

- Then I started grabbin', he said, "no no no, "you can't get things.

"Make arrangement with housing."

- Then ma'am, we'll go talk to management and we're gonna work the rest out for you, okay?

- I didn't just grab the bag.

It wasn't the things I needed.

I had, my Birth Certificate was gone, Social Security card, state ID.

You got the medicine bottles in that box?

- That's fine, it's stayin' here for right now.

(talking at the same time) (talking at the same time) - I said, "Sir, they're not gonna give me my things."

He said, "yes they will."

I said, "No they won't."

What they do is they're gonna take whatever they want out that apartment.

(talking at the same time) They do it all the time.

So I went to housin' and I asked them I say, "Can I come back and get some things "that I need, my Birth Certificate, State ID, "things like that?"

They told me no.

And I say, "well could you tell me what day "they're gonna throw the things out "of the apartment so I can be there "and recover some of my stuff?"

They told me no.

(chattering) After that when I was leaving the office they told me, "and as of today you can no longer "be on the premises, because if we see you here "we're gonna call the cops and have you arrested "for trespassing."

They threw away my husband's ashes.

They wouldn't let me get my Bible.

Everything's just gone.

(gentle music) Any spare change today, ma'am?

Bless your heart dear lady, thank you so much.

You have a beautiful day, stay blessed.

My whole world just crumbled like London Bridge fallin' down.

And I had nowhere to go.

And I knew I could've went to a shelter or something, but I did that before many, many years ago and things were stolen from me in the shelter.

They had bed bugs and plus, they have a curfew.

So I'd rather stay in a tent than in a shelter.

I'd rather be in my own home, but one day.

(mumbling) 1935.

Thank you Jesus, God bless it.

On a good day I might make 60, 70 bucks a day.

Bad day I might make 10.

If I don't have a good day I dumpster dive.

Grocery stores like Jewel's or Aldi's they throw out the day before food expires or that day when the food expires, they throw it out in the garbage.

You see family packs of chicken legs, bacon, hamburgers.

I can adapt to most anything.

I have to survive.

I have to eat.

One day I opened up the lid and I'm going through the garbage and I looked over and something with big eyes was lookin' at me.

It was a raccoon in the garbage can.

Scared the life outta me.

I was like, "okay you can have this garbage can, "I'll go to another one."

I do worry about getting sick, salmonella poison or anything knowing that the rodents may be in the garbage, too, you know, tearin' open stuff and eatin' out of it and I might grab it, rinse it out, wash it off.

I do worry about that.

But I do have faith that God's not gonna let nothing, he's not gonna give me more than I can bear.

He's not gonna let nothin' harm me, so.

That's enough for today.

One man's garbage is another man's treasure.

Okay guys, you can have it now.

(water splashing) Better wash over it 'cause if I don't then in the mornin' it'd be maggots over the meat, it'll be no good.

We did, we gonna eat this tonight and in the morning, by tomorrow evening.

'Cause I love to eat.

I share, too, 'cause people do come down, some or the other, all these people they come by, especially when they know I'm barbecuing.

They come by and get somethin' to eat.

First day, tired and I'm tired, ready to eat and you know what happens after you eat.

Go to sleep.

(laughing) Wish my grandkids could have been here today.

They start school tomorrow.

But, I'll get to see 'em soon I guess.

(gentle music) (gentle music continuing) (phone ringing) Good morning.

Yeah I'm on my way now.

I love how they know you by name.

I have an appointment at the clinic.

Unfortunately I do have a sleeping disorder.

It's kinda hard for me to get up on time and make my appointments.

4:45's fine.

So they changed it until next week.

Oh Jesus.

And I need this prescription.

It saves my life.

Keeps me from doing things that's not good for me.

So now I have another appointment for Tuesday, so I've just gotta try to stay on top of it.

- [Questioner] What's the prescription, what does it do?"

- It's suboxin, it's a heroin blocker.

I've been clean for over a year now and I don't wanna go back.

And if I don't have it I'm probably gonna go back.

And I don't wanna ever go back, 'cause it's gonna kill me.

Right now I'm just (mumbling).

Whew, I just I thank God that I'm alive 'cause I could be gone, but I'm here.

So I'll just take one day at a time.

I do know that every day is not the same and my time's comin'.

(upbeat music) I try to keep my faith in God because I know there's someone higher than me wakes me up every day.

(upbeat music) I joined this church because there's a lotta praise and worship and I like that, it lifts my spirit.

Hallelujah.

Hallelujah.

Hallelujah.

And I know God has a plan and it was written before I was even born.

I know he has a plan.

I just want him to hurry up, but I can't do that.

It's not my time, it's in his time.

- [Preacher] The Bible says look to the hills where comest your help.

- Yes, yes.

- [Preacher] All your help comes from the Lord.

- Yes, amen.

- Because God answer prayers, amen.

- I pray for strength, humbleness and housing.

Bein' homeless keeps me stressed out a lot.

Not on a lotta meds, I take high blood pressure medicine.

I have bronchial asthma, a bad back.

And that was due to the use of drugs.

Came this close to poppin' a disc paralyzing me, because it attacks your bone marrow.

Hey, hey, hey.

I was on heroin for about 30 years.

My mama used to say, "Why do you like somethin' "that has you scratchin' and diggin' "and walkin' sleep and bent over?"

I don't know, I used to ask God so much why do I like it, 'cause it definitely didn't like me.

So I had to stop.

- [Preacher] You feel like you're by yourself and you don't know what to do.

- I was in my home and I just started feelin' real nauseous, so I threw up and I was like, wow, I can't be sick, but just in case, so I'll do some dope.

I did it and then I started throwin' up again and I threw up for about two hours, nothin' but fluids just comin' out.

No food, no anything, and I'd ate.

So we called the ambulance and I went to the hospital.

I couldn't stop vomiting there either and they admitted me.

And when they admitted me I guess I was talkin' about harmin' myself and things.

They discharged me from the hospital.

They took me directly to the psych ward.

I stayed three days.

So they helped me with the withdrawals, vomiting, sweating and then they sent me to their clinic and I've been goin' to that clinic ever since.

I do be afraid a lotta times when I get depressed, you know, I get afraid.

I know if I go back to heroin it's going to kill me.

I'm gonna die.

And there's too many things that God has planned for me and my grandkids, so I can't go back.

- [Preacher] Calm me down.

We will have a lot of faith.

- But, as for me all I can say, thank you, Lord.

- [Preacher] Thank you, Lord.

- Thank you, Lord.

- [Preacher] Thank you, Lord.

- For all you've done for me today.

Whew.

(congregation clapping and cheering) (gentle music) I'm over a year that I haven't used heroin.

You want me to get that bag?

This is my certificate.

Certificate of Achievement, one year sobriety on this date, the 9th day of June of the year 2023.

It means a lot to me.

It means I'm on the right page.

It means that I can do anything if I just put my mind to it.

I thought I was gonna be an addict, I'm gonna be an addict all my life, just not, what do you call it?

Just not an active addict.

So me and heroin are no longer friends anymore.

I gotta get me a frame so I can just put it by my front door.

I want everyone to see it, when I get me an apartment, when they on their way out they can't help but see that certificate.

(gentle music) - Night Ministry.

- Morning to it.

- Night Ministry.

Yolanda.

- I hear them, Night Ministry is here and I raise right up because they life up the spirit.

They help me with food, sandwiches, water, face towels, bath cloths, hygiene kits, the necessities, things that I need.

They're the one actually who got my tent.

- Yolanda had asked me quite a few months ago, a while back, was last winter I think, she was askin', you know, "how do I get "a hold of one of those tents?"

It's cold out there.

Yolanda has a lotta health problems and the winter can exacerbate that.

You can get frostbite, hypothermia.

And they're somewhat protected here with the bridge, but at the same time, you don't want any human being to be out here in the winter.

- Good morning everyone.

- I am workin' with her on housing, her and Clarence.

They want to stay in that area, but it's become relatively wealthy so it's very difficult to find affordable housing there.

Are you willing to stretch your circle a little bit?

- Anywhere.

- Anywhere else.

- Anywhere.

In the name of Jesus, anywhere.

- Okay, all right.

- I need socks.

I need sandwich.

- Are you need glass of milk?

- Yes.

The Night Ministry has helped me get my state ID again, my Birth Certificate and my Social Security card.

I have those things.

- There you go.

- Let me put this in my bog.

- Often what I do is I work with the clients ahead of time on getting documents.

That's one of the first questions when they say I need housing, I ask do you have a state ID?

Do you have a Social?

Do you have a Birth Certificate?

How can I help you get that?

I'm pretty sure we don't have anything in there for them, but just in case.

Clarence, how you been?

- I'm makin' it so far.

I take my blood pressure medicine 'cause she keep my blood pressure up.

(laughing) (mumbling) - Nothin' yet, but I just talked to Yolanda about maybe lookin' a little bit further outside of this area here.

- Yeah that don't sound bad.

- Yeah 'cause that's mostly gonna help.

- I have told several people about the Night Ministry, and everyone that I've told about them, they have their apartments.

And I sometime I just cry, be like Lord, what's wrong with me gettin' mine?

I'm the one told them to call.

Maybe they have an income and I don't have an income.

Can't work, my doctor statement says I can't have prolonged standing, prolonged sitting.

Because it was they time, I guess I'll say that.

It was their season.

We all get a season.

Heavenly Father, I come boldly to your throne and ask that you send down your many blessings upon me, your blessings of hope.

Lord, I ask that you just give me strength and to keep Clarence safe, my mother, my sisters and my brother.

Father God, I ask that you just bless everyone in the world, Lord.

Bless all the unborn children with the affliction of addiction.

Bless all those that are helpin' us.

Bless the Night Ministry, Father God.

Bless the homeless and give them shelter.

Bless the hungry and feed them.

In the mighty name of Jesus I just thank you, Lord, for being who you are, my rock, my shield.

Father God, I just thank you for another day.

I just thank you for the blessings you bestow on me to be able to walk and talk and be able to do things that I can do that some people can't, Father God.

I can't say nothin' but hallelujah because it's the highest praise to you.

And also God, you're so worthy to be praised.

In Jesus name I give all the honor and glory, amen.

- [Recording On Phone] Your message has been sent.

Thank you for calling, goodbye.

(gentle music) I don't wanna live in my tent anymore.

If I have to I will, but I don't want to.

Well this is my home.

This is home sweet home.

I have lights through a battery pack.

I have the futon, they threw it out at Costco's and I went and got it, me and my fiance, we went and got it and let it out at night for the bed.

I'd rather be on the couch instead of the floor because of the rats.

And the orange bucket is my toilet.

I have a seat that I put on top when I have to use the bathroom.

Then after I use it I dump it out.

It's not much space, but it's a nice space for now.

I don't have any water.

Left it at my place and my daughter at hers.

I would take the kids to school, pick them up from school, help them with their homework, prepare dinner, and then I was in school at Malcolm X College for my GED.

After school at night, I'd come home, do my homework.

By then it's time for the kids to have their bath, gettin' them ready for school for the next day.

Even though my daughter was not far from me, I'll always want them with me.

Yeah I want to leave from under this bridge.

That's all I want.

I need to leave from under this bridge.

It's gonna be winter again, it's gonna get cold and I'm gonna be out here in this cold again.

Last year it was so terrible.

I haven't been takin' my psych meds for about two months now.

And I need 'em.

I walk around with a big old smile, but on the inside I'm tore up.

Just tired, really tired.

Tired of not havin'.

Just want to give up and say forget about it and it's not even worth it.

(gentle music) Sometime I walk, I'm by the river, so I walk to the river and I just look in the water and it looks so calm and quiet, which is a silent killer, and I know that, too.

I love my grandkids so much.

If I was to jump over in that river I wouldn't be here to see them no more.

So I have a choice.

Either I want this silent killer to have me calm and just take me away or I'm gonna fight this demon and get me some help.

(traffic moving) Hi, Kathryn, this is Yolanda.

I calling to see if I can get the doctor to have me a bed ready on the psych floor for Saturday.

Okay thanks so much, bye bye.

(gentle music) You gave me a pop.

You could've give me water.

Yep, I got my house shoes, deodorant.

I got people watching you.

No women down here when I'm not here.

Love you.

Be good.

- Love you, too.

- I need to go.

I know it's better for me.

Ain't gonna get no better if I don't go.

I need the help.

I've been so depressed, I need to be goin'.

Havin' bad thoughts, thinkin' 'bout bad things.

I don't like thinkin' the way I do 'cause it's not of God.

Thank you, sir, have a good day.

Behind you.

It's gonna help me because I need my medication.

So it's all gonna work out good.

(church bells ringing) (church bells ringing) - How is it?

- There you go, little child.

(child squealing) - Boy, you can run fast, can't you?

I've been back about a week.

I was in St. Mary's for five days.

I'm feeling a lot better, I'm good, I'm good.

I can get up and concentrate without crying or feeling sad or feeling angry.

I'm just normal.

There's a fish by your feet.

You see that big old fish by your feet?

(child squealing) When I was in the hospital in the beginning I would sleep.

Until I was able to feel better I didn't wanna be around anyone, so I would just you know, stay in my room.

After the second day I start communicating with other patients.

I got my hair braided.

Got to take me a couple of good showers.

Oh I love that.

Boy, let's go, let's go.

- [Child] Okay.

- My two grandkids number one they keep me warm because they're grandma, grandma, grandma.

Grandma this, grandma that.

Come on let's go it's good.

What are you doin' grandma?

Come on, grandma.

You thinking 'bout a ice cream sundae?

They're seven and eight, eight and nine?

- [Child] Eight and nine.

- Eight and nine.

Okay eight and nine years old.

They're big boys now.

They're very respectable, they're polite, they're kind and I think they miss me, too.

You guys miss me?

- [Children] Yes.

- All right.

(sneezing) God bless you.

See that's why I let you in that water.

You be all right.

If I start feeling like I'm not me I'm gonna find me some help somewhere.

I have grandkids I have to be here for.

I have a fiance that I have to marry.

Right now all I can do is what I do best to survive.

Get up in the morning, brush my teeth, wash my face, get my sign, grab my walker, go on the corner, pan handle.

Can you spare some change, sir?

Nobody need spare change please.

Any spare change, ma'am?

God bless you, have a good day.

It's hard.

It's not easy at all livin' on the streets.

I pray to God that I do get a place.

Please help me with some spare change please.

Anything is appreciated.

God bless you, ma'am.

It's fine.

I just want all the people that are out here in this world who's homeless, them that's hungry, to just try to just hold on and have faith.

Just hold on.

Things gonna get better.

I know they will.

Please help some spare change please.

Please help with some spare change please.

God bless you, have a wonderful day.

Any spare change please.

Anything is appreciated.